RDP218 Roy.Pod? I Should Have Called It Vader's Chill Ball

By Roy Mathur, on 2018-09-06, at 23:26:28--00:13:16 BST, for Roy Dot Pod, Listen

A New Show Title... At Last

It's not exactly ground breaking, but if I'm mistaken for a race horse or a tattoo parlour one more time...

A Happier Podcast

I'm a fairly negative, highly strung chap. I've said it before; that this is unfortunately often reflected in the tone of this podcast. Particularly the last few weeks.

Not that I want to gloss over the mess the world is in, but I think it is time that my podcast becomes a refuge, a redoubt, a fortress of... fun. Somewhere like-minded geeks can gather to cheer themselves up.

It's not a big change, but I am going to start properly enforcing an editorial policy on myself, to make sure the show doesn't get too miserable. I'm still complaining about stuff. I'll just do it in a less angry way. Life's too short. I might even make a big poster stating this new editorial policy and stick it to the studio wall, so that I can't avoid seeing it. Or I'll just have a ready supply of sweets.

To those who have stuck with the podcast thus far, thanks and hopefully things will get better from now... both in the show, and who knows, even out there in the real world too! Geeks deserve a break and hopefully that's what they'll get from this podcast.

Today, I'll make an effort to be cheerful, though if I get ranty, and despite the title of this episode that seems likely given the content of today's show, I might have to resort to the tuck box during the show.

Shows Ending: Game of Thrones (2019), The Big Bang Theory (2018), Mr. Robot (2018)

Game of Thrones ends in season 8, though there might be delay as to when that final season starts, but recently we also found out that Season 12 of The Big Bang theory will be the last.

I'm a fan of the show , but I have just wanted this to end for so long, and now, finally, with Jim Parson's desire to move on, the show will wrap in its 12th season set to air from Monday September 24th.

Mr. Robot is also ending in season 4, which we should get around October. Hats off to the producers for not doing a Walking Dead and pray that there are no more spinoffs, like Young Sheldon... urgh! Hats also off to Jim Parsons who could have strung The Big Bang Theory along forever.

Mr. Mercedes

2018.

Mr. Mercedes is very, very slow moving this season. I'm getting impatient. Will the big guy retire? Will the maniac wake up? Drip, drip, driiip. It is my ADHD or is this really sluggish?

Come on!

Castle Rock

2018.

Castle Rock has just become so convoluted with plotitis that I am ready to throw my hands in the air and just give up. Complicated is okay, muddled is not and if you can't do complicated, reduce the amount of plot.

I know this makes me sound like the thick Emperor in Amadeus, who says there're too many notes in Mozart's music, to which Mozart replies "Which ones?", but most TV shows aren't produced by Mozart-level filmmakers, but that's okay and I'm okay with a less plot if it means a more cohesive script.

Thirteen

2016.

BBC thriller in which woman turns up after being abducted by a maniac and imprisoned for thirteen years in a basement.

It was tense and really enjoyable enough for me to boxset the whole thing on iPlayer.

Although not the only, or best, drama of this type, which have almost become a trope since the even more horrifying real life case from 2008 of a German woman held for 24 years, I thought it struck the right balance of what the audience (me) could stomach. I also really liked the abrupt, but satisfying ending.

Sick for Toys

2018.

Horror about the dangers of dating, from a male perspective.

The balance of fun versus gore (what I'm calling, this one time, to sound really clever, the exploitation ratio) is totally off in this low budget horror, and just makes this whole thing descend into unpleasantness. The one positive is the twist at the end, which is quite good.

Mad Musk

I'm taking Tesla off the market! No, I'm not! Oh no, the SEC are investigating me! Wait, why don't I call that rescue diver guy a pedo... again?!

Mad Max? No; Mad Musk.

Well, at least he's keeping us entertained.

Bezos the Plutocrat

Amazon is now also a trillion dollar tech company. Maybe Bezos can now afford to pay his warehouse operatives more.

I worked in warehouses in Vancouver for a long damn time, and those people deserve good wages and safe working conditions, which so often employers completely ignore.

FBI Interested in LuminosityLink Buyers

In an email, Google warned buyers of remote access security app LuminosityLink that the FBI had asked to see their data.

Five Eyes Want Big Tech Backdoors Again

Five Eyes governments (USA, UK, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand) yet again demanded the big tech companies build backdoors.

This stupidity again.

In the UK, all political parties are responsible for this mess; either by actively seeking this or staying silent.

I'm not sure why they think a techno police state is something we need. I'm sure they'll come a time when we are only allowed to wear transparent clothes. I know! Urghhh! Right? But you know what? Since they want us to have no privacy whatsoever and collect every single piece of data on the internet, here's an idea: to save our respective governments time, just send them nude selfies. I'm sure they'll thank you.

Update on My Trial Vodaphone/CityFibre Gigabit Installation

UK specific news.

Me to marketing: make sure you bring enough cat6. Me to sales: make sure you bring enough cat6. Me to engineer: make sure you bring enough cat6.

Engineer: we don't have enough cat6, you'll have to buy that yourself. Also we can't put the cable where you want, we have to make a hole in the wall, also we can't actually install it because CityFibre forgot to bring the junction to half the addresses in your road.

Brilliant.

The sad thing is that I've been told that I am one of twelve in the pilot rollout and I'm guessing that I'm the only tech journalist and podcaster in that group. What a coup it would have been for them to get this right.

Mail Bag/Twitter Stream Break

Judy Garland's Ruby Slippers

Flowers in the Attic

Billy Dee Williams Reprising Lando Role in Star Wars IX

Anne Dowd

Dune Movie News

Samsung Note 9, Apple iPhone XS, X Plus, and SE 2

The new Note is boosted to hell and available now. The souped up Note includes and enormous 6.4-inch Super AMOLED display and the new iPhones, with displays ranging from smaller LCDs to AMOLED of 5.4 to a slightly Samsung hammering 6.5 inches, but won't be available until September. There's also a lot of blah about other specs, but in summation: they are all brilliant smartphones, yes, but still a bit of a snorefest because I'll never be able to afford them because they all cost more than a grand.

I'm sure many people will opt to buy these via some draconian contract, but if I can't buy outright, I'm not interested.

Also, they are all updates of existing tech rather than a new paradigm, but the Samsung apparently has liquid cooling, which is the first time I've heard it used in a phone, but Samsung say they first used it in the Galaxy 7. They call the technique water carbon cooling and, though their explanation is convoluted, steam is actually involved! Does that make it a steampunk smartphone?

Parker Solar Probe

Launched from Cape Canaveral on August 12th 2018, the Parker Solar Probe will slingshot around Venus seven times over seven years to bring it to the Sun, where it will fly through the Sun's atmosphere, known as the corona, which is 3.8 million miles to from its surface.

This is seven times closer than any spacecraft has come before. To get this close, the ship has an 11.43 cm carbon-composite shield to protect it from temperatures of about 1377 degrees Centigrade.

The ship is named after heliophysicist Dr Eugene Parker.

New Horizons on Its Way to Ultima Thule

New Horizons was launched from Cape Canaveral on January 19th 2006 heading to Pluto.

Aided by Jupiter's gravity, it reached Pluto in summer 2015, then had its mission extended and headed for the Kuiper Belt.

Recently booted up, the first place New Horizons is going to visit, travelling at 31666.66666666667 mph, is an icy minor planet in the Kuiper Belt called Ultima Thule ((486958) 2014 MU69) on January 1st 2019. This will be the furthest anything human made has ever gone.

Cue Star Trek intro.

Novel Submission Time Again

Yes, I have been submitting a novel again.

Out of nervousness, I fluffed two submissions and have to send documents twice. In my second email, I made a grammar mistake and wrote a third email explaining how I could actually write. Oh dear.

Still, it's going better now.

This is my creative tip of the week: only attempt one submission a day because...

Every Literary Agent Asks For Something Different

I don't know why they do it.

They complain about the volume of submissions, but if they could all ask only for completed manuscripts and a synopsis, they'd get fewer pointless submissions to weed and the process would be standardised.

Come on agents!

Literary Agencies Who Try To Sell You Stuff

Not vanity publishers, but some legitimate, big name agencies try to sell you books on writing, getting published, or creative writing courses, while you are doing an online submission.

I think this is unfair, as desperate writers will do almost anything to get published, including spending money they don't have.

Although this is thankfully the exception, not the rule, to those few agencies who do try to sell us things, please stop doing that. I have talked about this before, but again: it is for us to sell something to you, not vice versa.